I turned 38 on September 4th. I never thought I’d be childless at 38 years of age. Yes I am TRULY very lucky that I have an amazing little girl in my life who is my stepdaughter but it’s not the same. I’m also very lucky that I am still currently pregnant after my IVF cycle. The past 2 weeks have been filled with excitement and anxiety. We had our 6 week check and everything was great. We went back yesterday for our 8 week check and I was filled with so many emotions.

Last time I was pregnant I walked in there with my husband SO excited and we couldn’t wait to see the heartbeat and our baby. Our dreams were crushed that day. Although I was doing my best to stay positive up until yesterday, it was really hard. B & I were optimistic since we had such a great appointment 2 weeks ago. But there was still that fear. The second I sat on that table I started to feel like I was going to throw up (or poop my pants, really!).

The doctor came in and asked if I was ready. I said “I GUESS!”. I laid down, took a deep breath and stared at the screen waiting to see our baby.

THERE IT IS!!!

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Our little peanut! The heart flutters were amazing to see too.

For some reason I thought it would be bigger but I’m not complaining!! He/She is right where it’s supposed to be.

I can breathe again…for now LOL!

I am 8 weeks tomorrow and have an appointment with my OB in 3 weeks.

Walking out of the doors at the Fertility Clinic was bittersweet. I had been seeing them for the past year and a half. They had become my family. I couldn’t believe that was (hopefully) the last time I’m going to see them for this pregnancy.

We still have a long way to go but we are excited and hopeful. Only time will tell!

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